jikan_network | {Video; UN: gambler}

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{Video; UN: gambler}

{He looks like a shell of a man, pale and perfect, but...empty. Nearly empty. This is what happens when someone is used and used for years on end without a shred of gratitude or genuine affection thrown into the mix. And now...}

The thread that joins us has snapped. {Xie closes his eyes, privately mourning, before he focuses on the network, sharp and alert.} I am interested if anyone recognizes me?

{Or is this truly a new beginning? The Glazed Armor hangs heavy around his neck and he wants to laugh...and cry.}

What good are names anymore? I could call myself anything...

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{Xie fights with himself before pushing himself onto his feet. He sits down beside Zishu and reaches, hesitantly, for his hand.}

Zhou Zishu, I need a guide. I'm not too proud to say that. If you will aid me, I will help you all that I can. I'm not a monster, though I have done monstrous things.

[ Zishu looks up, head moving just enough so he can see. But he doesn't flinch away from Scorpion - he figures if the other wanted to hurt or even kill him...he would have already. He lets his hand be taken, listening. ]

I will help you however I can. We have both done horrible things. I have my reason and way for changing with me. You just need to find yours.

{He has no desire to attack. Zishu has now taken a special place in his heart and he is one of the few that Xie will outright refuse to raise a finger against.}

I remember stories about your leadership. You've changed.

If you can do it, I can too.

Aah. Decisive and cruel. Yes. That is what I was for Prince Jin.

And how I am with myself. [ His punishment to leave is evidence enough.

Zishu nods and gently squeezes Scorpion's hand. ]

Your...loss. That is your point to change. Your desire to change your name. Have you chosen one yet?

Liu Xie. {He returns the squeeze, gripping Zishu's hand. He feels like he can breathe easier, knowing he isn't completely alone.}

Do you remember Liu Qian Qiao?

Liu Qian Qiao... [ He thinks a moment, head tilting. ]

Beauty Ghost. Yes. Was she a friend?

She dedicated herself to me for the sake of saving the man she loved.

{And Xie saw for himself how that man failed her again and again.}

She suffered... Not because of me, but because of him. I gave her what she needed to be free, but I guess she chose to stay.

[ His expression softens in understanding. ]

...You did what you could for her. Maybe she chose to stay because she saw someone worth working for.

I don't feel like I did enough. {His throat is tight and his voice is hushed.} She told me once that giving your heart to another is a gamble. You could be happier than ever or you could be more miserable than ever. It hurt me that she was the latter.

[ Pain he understands, too. He turns to face Scorpion, studying his expression. ]

Life is a gamble. Sometimes you lose. She taught you an important lesson.

{Scorpion just looks...sad. He is in mourning and he has had to hide it. Until now.}

I'm seeing that even if I do lose, that doesn't mean I have to die.

[ Mourning that Zishu understands. It's driven him too. ]

I hope you learned that before it's too late. Do not be like me.

{He doesn't like that. Why does Zishu have to die prematurely?}

Your friends haven't found a way to undo the damage?

There are techniques. One would require me to lose my martial arts, and I would still die after ten years of being worthless and unable to protect anyone. The other...I was brought here before a friend could come administer it.

[ What he thinks of the former is obvious. But the latter? That could work. ]

{He can't help hoping...}

I wouldn't want to be weak like that either. Even if you were promised ten years, who knows if you could survive that long? Our world is cruel.

[ He says nothing for a few minutes, gazing turning away as he remembers how horrified and angry Kexing had been when he'd refused the first option given. This man understands it. ]

It doesn't matter. Either another cure is found and I accept it, or I spend what time I have living as best I can.

{The silence has him resting a hand on Zishu's shoulder, light and warm.}

I have faith a cure will be found. Don't give up. Though I see no harm in living each day to the fullest in the meantime.

[ The compassion surprises him, but also makes him chuckle when it's the Scorpion King who tells him not to give up on life or hope. ]

I will be sure to tell you when it happens, then.

[ He can do no less! ]

{Compassion comes to him easily, readily when he is in certain company. He has a heart.}

I would like to know. {Xie doesn't like being helpless, but healing isn't his strength.} I trust you are determined? You won't undo it?

[ As Zishu is learning! And liking what he sees.

He sighs at the questions, then sits back to think about them, finally unfolding from the meditative pose. ]

When I put the nails in, I didn't care. I had nothing left to live for. Now I do. If I can be cured and not lose my martial arts, then that would be good.

{The problem before was he gave his heart to the wrong person. He won't make that mistake again.

It's nice to see Zishu relaxing and Xie follows suit, resting his arm on the back of the sofa.}

Life is the first gift we are given. You shouldn't rid yourself of it prematurely.

Edited 2021-06-01 05:04 (UTC)

Everyone needs something to live for.

Even if it's just to see tomorrow.

Mm. Even if just one day.

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{Video; UN: gambler}

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