jikan_network | video; un

Entry tags:

original: baein etoile-etienne

video; un - usernamehere

[ the video flickers online on before two wide red eyes fill most of the screen. ]

Oh! My apologies...

[ the camera pans back so a face is visible instead, showing a faint strawberry blonde wearing a fancy, high collared white shirt with a fluffy cravat. he looks a little pale, brows set into a vague frown, and with his bottom lip caught between his front teeth in thought. it looks reddish and like he's been nibbling on it for a while without thinking about it, and here and there there's a flash of small but sharp fangs. ]

Hello, my name is Baein. I was wondering if anyone knows whether people close to you would also get stuck in the time loop and come with you, or if you've found you always arrive alone? If it's possible to meet people you know here?

[ there's a distinct noise of his stomach grumbling and baein curls his arm around it, eyes widening even more before he looks up at the camera again before he takes a breath and straightens as if nothing happened. ]

Anyway, I'm looking for two people like that. They're of faery court and werewolf clan.

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I wanted to meet the person who is friends with them.

[ he tries not to refer to this daeshim and jasper as his. they're not, and baein is aware of that. he hasn't even met them yet, but from the descriptions, he can already tell. ]

I'm not sure what kind of people they are, if they're anything like the Daeshim and Jasper I know, but I don't doubt they're good people. And I can tell you are too.

[ it's odd, that he asked, and maybe at first he just wanted lennon to tell him about them, but... that also feels wrong. maybe he just wants to get to know this person better too. ]

Would it be strange if I just figured I'd like to get to know you? You're the first person I've talked to after the... ah, "introduction". I still have a hard time wrapping my head around all that.

[ Lennon can agree with the idea of Daeshim and Jasper being good people even if... there are some questionable things -- especially with Daeshim and his claiming and all of that. He chews on the inside of his cheek a moment before his tongue swipes out to wet his lips. Why is he starting to feel nervous?

Maybe it's because for Lennon, he knows that they all belong to each other and he's just an interloper passing through. It's alright, though. He'd never seen himself as anything but a placeholder for Daeshim and that had already been crumbling a little when Jasper showed up. ]

It's... not strange, I guess but... I'm not really that good of a person.

[ Lennon looks anywhere but at Baein. ]

And I'm pretty simple but you can know what you want to know.

No one is simple. And only you should decide what you'd want to reveal about yourself. If that is a lot or nothing at all, is your choice entirely.

[ his smile is a little lopsided as he gestures to the table behind them. ]

Sit with me? Of course, I understand if you'd rather not, too.

[ It's a weird mix of ease and uneasiness being in Baein's presence. He's so nice and yet there's something... maybe some human sense of something other but Lennon can't pinpoint it. He still barely believes in fae and only because Daeshim has been obnoxiously proving his capabilities one at a time. ]

Are you different... like them?

[ Lennon asks as he moves to sit down at the table the had indicated. He pushes his fingers through his hair and searches his wrist for a hairtie finding he must have left his somewhere again. ]

I'm just... a human. But... Jasper can make electricity with his body...or something... and Daeshim is a fae. What are you?

[ Because he must be something, right? ]

[ baein freezes at the question, halfway moving to sit down. his heart that doesn't beat feels like it's vibrating in his chest and baein's grip on the chair suddenly feels like it's burning with how he can feel every ridge and indent and grain of the wood against his hand. it's only for a second before he turns to stare at lennon even as he slowly sinks into his seat, anxiety prickling under his skin. ]

I...

[ just because daeshim and jasper are different (different in ways baein doesn't even know), it doesn't mean he should be different too, right? but he's constantly reminded of the fact that he's not human anymore. he pulls a deep breath, and can't stop focusing on the way air just doesn't happen at all before he looks down to his lap. and just because his daeshim and jasper accepts him and what he's become, even if they shouldn't, baein wouldn't expect anyone else to accept it. even his own court tiptoes around him, talks about him behind his back, but never to his face. he hears it all regardless. ]

You can tell?

[ Well, if it wasn't obvious before -- his reaction to the question makes it so. He studies him. Lennon's good at reading people generally. He has to be. So he can see the anxiety he'd just caused with his questions. He considers retracting his question but no, he wants to know.

So, he just sits seemingly relaxed in his own chair as he watches Baein. He's anything but relaxed. His pulse is racing. ]

Something seems different--off, yeah...but also just feels like you wouldn't be someone normal when they aren't.

I'm not human, no. I used to be.

[ baein desperately wants to leave it at that, though he's not sure if that's fair to the other, considering what he is. for all intents and purposes, a vampire is a predator. baein is far from a predator, but can he even help himself if it goes too far? he doesn't know.

the comparison makes him huff a laugh, and he looks up again. ]

The odds. In my... um, world, Daeshim and Jasper aren't human at all. They never were. I was, for a while, at least. But I did something reckless and I paid for it.

[ by his body dying, now only a cold and still husk still somehow hosting baein's soul and his consciousness. he only ever feels warm from drinking blood, and it's not even happened too many times because the thought itself makes him feel ill, sick to his stomach, like he is the worst kind of creature. ]

[ Lennon thinks about that. It's still so strange to him to realize that there are now at least four worlds on top of his own. He feels ill at ease about it. Is there more of him? Is there a him that's better?

He has to shake off that train of thought before he becomes morose. Instead, he focuses his attention on Baein, trying to determine what it is the other is when the other isn't telling him and he doesn't want to press the question again if the other doesn't offer the answer.

It seems like it might be a touchy subject. ]

One reckless thing can cause a lifetime of payment.

[ He says thoughtfully and then shakes his head, forcing a smile. ]

I'm nothing interesting. A nobody really. I take my clothes off for money to pay for school and I'm not ... I wasn't even doing that great in school because I didn't actually have enough time to study. You seem like you're a lot more worth knowing. Even if you guys are from different worlds I think Daeshim won't be disappointed.

[ Honestly, he doesn't know Jasper well enough to say for sure but he does think it's probably true for him too. ]

... yes, I'm aware of that. I almost died.

[ and almost killed his loved ones. almost lost everything because he went outside when he shouldn't have. because the night market was too tempting during a time that was unsafe. baein's shoulders sags where he sits and he's back to fiddling with his fingers for a second before he flattens his palms over his thighs and then breathes out.

he does frown a little as he looks up though, tilts his head as if not understanding some parts of lennon's words. disappointed? if daeshim knows him and is friends with lennon, that counts. ]

You seem very much like someone to me. Comparing yourself to others... I do understand that feeling, and I cannot say I have not done the same, but please don't undervalue yourself.

[ baein is being a hypocrite, and he knows that, but he'd loathe for someone to put him above themselves in terms of worth. ]

What makes you say that? You don't know much about me, and we're different people. You cannot compare like that, it's not fair to anyone, least of all you. You're alive, and you have worth.

I'm glad you didn't.

[ Baein is nice. And... good for Daeshim. He's already sure of it even if they're not from the same worlds. He just doesn't think that will matter too much. It's like a red string of fate or something.

Lennon shakes off the other's words, waving his hand a little. He doesn't even know why he bothered saying anything about himself and now he feels guilty for it. Not that he would admit as much. He smiles, leaning forward some, his elbows pressed into his thighs. ]

You have to get to know somebody before you know if stuff like that is true. I might be a serial killer for all you know.

[ He's not. ]

Anyway... What do you have questions about? I'm sure you have some.

[ baein's smile turn a little lopsided. he does understand the feeling, but he leans in a little it too, eyes twinkling for a second. ]

I might be a monster for all you know.

[ technically he is a monster, even if both daeshim and jasper would argue otherwise. baein still doesn't feel like himself, and still isn't sure if he one day will lose grip of reality entirely. he did at first when he just turned. he had to be hurt and hurt his important people to realize himself again. ]

You... take your clothes off for money?

[ perhaps it's not the wisest of things to focus on at first, but at least there's not a shred of judgement in baein's voice or expression, just genuine curiosity. of course, he's well aware of what prostitution is. he runs a kingdom, there are people like that among his subjects too. ]

Did you choose it?

There are good monsters and bad monsters too. Humans can be monsters, so your point is irrelevant.

[ It's said with a playful smile. He's relaxing a little, steering his thoughts away from Daeshim as much as he can for the moment and the topic of conversation makes it easy enough for him.

Lennon laughs and his thumb reaches up pressing at his bottom lip for a moment before lifting a shoulder. ]

I do. I don't mind it either. And, I chose it because it was the best shitty option out of a lot of shitty options but I don't regret it.

[ baein looks down then, and chuckles almost. ]

... you are very right.

[ it was humans who attacked daeshim's wolf clan. it's humans who looked down on daeshim and jasper for being who they were. and it's humans who speaks behind baein's back now that he's not the prince he used to be. but they're too afraid to say it to his face.

but the conversation flows more easily now, and baein gives lennon his attention again when the man speaks. the topic is honestly rather scandalous, but baein doesn't feel uncomfortable talking about it, though if he wasn't currently hungry and empty for blood, a measure of pink would tinge his cheeks. ]

If you don't regret it, then it's good. But do you enjoy it, or just not mind it? They can be very different.

I usually am.

[ Lennon preens a bit and he feels like sometimes he can see gears turning in Baein's head but maybe he's just assuming. He wonders what it is that Baein is. One doesn't say they might be a monster if they haven't thought they might be a monster. ]

Sometimes... I enjoy it. I mean, it's not like I don't get off.

[ Lennon shrugs. ]

It's nice to be wanted, to know I have an effect on people.

[ baein actually laughs at that, brightly and amused, and seems more at ease. ]

Better than not being right, any day.

[ he does reach up to rub a finger over his nose then. it feels like he's flushing, even if it's not really visible on his skin. ]

Ah... mm. Yes, I can understand that would be a good reason too.

Mmm.

[ Lennon hums with an imitation of a sage nod.

His eyes follow the movement of the other's finger and he tilts his head, eyes narrowing some -- mischievous. ]

There's even people that follow me online waiting for me to go live. I let them make requests sometimes. I could show you someday.

[ at that, baein tilts his head, confusion yet again lining his expression. ]

What is online...? Like this video...? Wait—

[ show him? if there's any blood left in baein's body, it's going straight to the tips of his ears, and he can almost feel it, though he knows it's not there. his eyes widen though as he looks back at lennon above his fingers still lingering on his face. ]

S-show me?

Yeah. Like the video call earlier. Except it usually wasn't just one person chatting and watching me.

[ every once in a while a private show but not very often at all. He doesn't look away, not shy at all when it comes to something like this and well it's easy to be inappropriate. This is a safe zone for him. ]

Yeah. Give you an example of my work.

... I don't think I could do that kind of thing.

[ but he sounds almost awed, though he seems to have a hard time looking at lennon for a second. he's not sure what to think. why is lennon offering something like that to him? he's not... he's— flustered, it's almost visible, despite the lack of heat to his skin. ]

You don't... have to do that. That feels intimate. I would not want to invade your privacy.

[ Lennon can't help himself. He laughs. He's amused by the other being flustered but also by the idea of his privacy being invaded. ]

Thousands of people watch me at a time back home. I don't care about people seeing my body. It's only intimate if it matters.

[ he looks up again then, an unreadable expression on his face. it's hard to wrap his mind around wanting to give your body to someone without feelings attached. baein has always... figured he'd have to either find feelings when his inevitable engagement would have happened, and would have to weather having feelings for jasper and daeshim that would never come to fruition. then again...

he's a vampire now. no doubt he won't find a suitor anytime soon. it's complicated. if he's even expected to marry someone someday anymore. ]

So it doesn't matter, then? That feels... lonely.

It's for money most of the time, of course, it doesn't matter.

[ Lennon isn't bothered by it. And he doesn't answer the lonely part at all. ]

You're a person, though. You matter.

I'm not saying it's a bad thing, if you're comfortable with it. But you matter.

[ Lennon waves his hand and the shift in the conversation makes him uncomfortable. ]

That's not what we're talking about.

No? My apologies.

[ his smile is a little rueful, but genuine. ]

So what are we talking about?

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